Begging for my life

I need you great Jehovah
I cannot survive alone
For in this life my dearest; lover
It is I who must atone
You gave your precious son 
To save me from my sins
Everything you have done
Reminds me of where I've been
Into the deepest pit you reached
You took me by the hand
Ah dear Lord I prayed; beseeched
"Please include me in your plan"
This blessed plan of salvation
This amazing coincidence
That you should find us: a nation
Worthy of your providence
Here I am a simple sinner
Begging for my life
Here I am a simple winner
Saved from all this strife

Vision test

Had my latest vision test 
With the local Optometrist 
Bright lights shone into my eyes
Hurt; just a little bit; surprised
Isn't it amazing now 
How they can look inside
Check for abnormalities 
Look at arteries; veins 
Glaucoma, cataracts
Macular degeneration...
All these that lead to fuzziness
Prescribe glasses to improve it all
Pay the cost to get a better view
Of everything that you need to do

Crying again

Tears flow from my eyes
Sadness comes by and by
Claire lost her baby...
Jamie was taken away
Ah now I'm crying 
For another fear
I'm ashamed to admit it
Ashamed to say
I am afraid of losing you 
My mother dear
Time is disappearing 
Time is nearly gone
I need to hear your voice
Through the lines
Of the telephone
I watched your face
As the doctor said
More tests to be taken
But where does this lead?
I know our days are numbered
I know our time must come
But please dear Lord
Let me not come undone
How much sadness 
Must one bear
Before it is time
To release a loved one
To your care
Ah Lord I am saddened
Ah Lord I am distraught
I am lost in that very thought 
How do I say goodbye?
How do I cope?
With all of these terrors
With all of these fears
Yes my dear saviour
What do I do?
With all of these tears

Trust in the Lord above

Into Thy hands oh Lord
I commend my spirit; my soul
For I know that all things come
To those who wait in faith: stay strong
Though externally I may not look
Like I have any strength: over and above
That of a simple woman: a simple heart
Yet here within this quiet soul; speaks
This heart of mine; that weakest human link-p0[;
Here inside I find my thoughts do fly
Up to the very heavens: up into blue skies
Communication in prayers: in thoughts
I know that we are linked: angel messengers
Descend upon those blessed stairs
Holding that gossamer ribbon between
Our beating hearts: our breathing body
Connected; alive; humming with life
So dear Lord; I trust in you; above all others
For you gave your son for my sins
You took my scarlet robes; exchanged them 
For white raiment: pure and clean
Without you in my life I am so very lost
How could I ever hope to repay that greatest cost...

How can I go on?

There's something bothering me
Something nobody else can see
A pain that wells up within my heart
A fear I guess: a dread; that's a start
Mum is not well and I know her time
Is running short: is passing forward fast
Though I pray; it does not seem enough
How can another see? Ever understand?
Unless you've faced the very same trials?
How can you feel this pain along with me?
Though I am so lucky: so very blessed 
Still I must face this utterly painful test
I love my dear mum and wish it could be
That I never, ever have to part from thee
Yet in my heart I know that time must come
When she must give up the ghost; succumb
Then; we who are left behind to grieve
Must trust in God: have faith; believe
That though she sleeps I know one day
There will come that totally amazing day
When our dear Lord will come again
When even death; shall conquered be!

Bad news

My heart is sad today
The news is bad today
Mum's myeloma hasn't gone away
There's more chemo on the way
Guess there's no other option
She's got to accept the deal
Biopsy and PET scan to come
This illness has not come undone
But as long as I have breath in me
I'll pray the Lord fill me
With hope enough to sustain me
Keep her safe and ease her pain
Hear my prayers my sovereign
Please grant her peace
Let all this not be in vain
Dear Lord please deliver us all

She's yummy

My little Elfy
Is two and a half years old
She is so precious
My joy cannot be told
She is talking a mile a minute
She expresses so many feelings
Tells me tales of wrong doing 
Tells me all about her day
Yesterday Kachirii was annoying 
She kept slobbering on me
I put up my hand and stopped her
Saying "kachirii please go away"
Elfy came and held her hand up 
Saying "Nana don't do that!"
"Kachirii is yummy: she is a good girl"
"Don't treat her that way"
What a precious little angel
God gave to us almost 3 years ago
She is such a beautiful hearted child
Who wouldn't love her
Just as much as I do
Each and every single day...

The other day daddy was joking 
Saying Nana was to blame
Elfy ably defended me 
Saying "No Nana didn't do it
Nana is yummy: Nana is okay"
Such a precious little angel
Thank you dear Lord I pray
For sending gorgeous little angels
To defend us each and every day