Turbulent heart

There's a strong wind a blowing 
From over the great Southern seas
Scattering all the creatures; glory be
No birds winging; no birds singing
Just a few southerners out there
A couple of surfers; enjoying the waves
Surfboards at the ready; yes siree
A man in a wheelchair; feeling free
Dipping his toes into turbulent seas
A few children building sandcastles
A simple little happy family; what glee?
A couple walking with their little dog
Maybe someone going for a jog...
And here I sit above them all; watching
This scene; wishing it was me
Feeling joyful; feeling happy...
But I am feeling troubled; unsettled you see
I wish everything was peaceful
I wish everything was secure for me
My heart is breaking; I'm crying; freely
My heart is like that stormy ocean
My feelings; like those choppy waves
Turbulent as those stormy seas
Ah I feel so lost; God help me!

View from the Jetty at Port Noarlunga

Enjoyed the fierceness of the sea
It felt good to be so near
So close to the edge
I love the turbulence
I love the strength, the power
Of the waves; crashing
The wind blowing 
The negative ions
Delivering the oxygen to me
Felt the jetty moving 
As the waves kept sweeping in
Ah how beautiful dear Lord
I felt the rocking of the seas
As they kept on coming in
Like a baby cradled close
I felt comforted the most
To be so very close
To my dear Lord 
And the sea...

Simply the best

Simply the best
Time of my life
I had with you
This past year
Exercised in nature
Watched God's creatures
In the fresh air
Wind in my hair
Loved without a care
This too we shared
Felt accepted at last
Forgot my past
Grew a pace
Ran a good race
Heavens above
Fell in love
With your smiles
We drove for miles
Saw such sights
Eagles in flight
Stormy seas
Native bees
Climbed the heights
Ah such delights
As I have never known
My mind was truly blown
Never had a love as true
As the love I found with you

Words unspoken

I left the words unspoken
Left them there inside my head
Thoughts ran away; broken
Ah if only I had said...

I guess I lacked the courage
I guess it's always been just so
Have never said out loud
Those thoughts that hurt me so

As a little child in school
I was made to feel the fool
Took her back; found the lack
Of courage; felt so uncool

In high school I was bullied
Guess they knew I couldn't say
How it hurt; inside I kept it all
Until it grew; festered to this day

Many times I let him hurt me
Though he said he loved me so
Why did I allow that torture
Ah dear Lord I truly wish to know

Time has passed by so quickly
My life is changing; this I know
Now again I am left hurting
For those words I left unspoken; oh

I seem to wander through this jungle
Tangled vines beset my every path
Just when I think I see some light
There comes the struggle; pain, blight

Ah God in heaven help me
For I'm in trouble deep
I love; am loved; but it's torment
For those words within me weep

Should have said those words; yes
Should have shouted them out loud
Grew some balls and said no less
Stood up; my love confessed

But I left those words unspoken
Left them crying in my head
Now my love has left me forsaken
These days I wish they weren't unsaid...

Just Two more days

Just two more days
I ask of you
Just be patient a little while
All is almost done
Just two more days my love
What is 48 hours?
We'll have our lives to live
Just two more days my darling
And I will come to you
Together we will be
I promise all will be okay
Just be patient my honey
My work is almost over
My time will finally come
Just two more days my darling
We will walk together
Into the bright new sun

Restlessness

Feeling restless
Feeling strained
Felt the need to exercise
Felt the need to unwind
Took a swim in the ocean
Took a little bit of time; out
Away from the turmoil
Away from the pain
I'm feeling hemmed in
Feeling sad again
Felt good to be moving
Felt good to be outside
I'm not good at sitting still
Not good at handling this heat
Love fresh air and exercise
Love to be out in nature
Don't like living in the city
No; I'd rather be far away
From all the hustle and bustle
Away from all this pollution
Away from all this noise
Give me the peace of the countryside
Give me nature any day
I can take the peacefulness
But here I cannot abide...

Glorious Christies Beach

Glorious Christies Beach...
Had a wonderful swim...
There was very little floating debris
Last time it was awful with all the mess
The water was full of bits of sea grass
Today it was lovely and clean...
Saw a bright orange starfish
Hundreds of tiny inchlings
Puffer fish galore
A sting ray watched me swim by
Ready to flee if need be
Sparred with a blue crab
She was ready to protect herself
Was allowed to swim close
To a school of tiny inquisitive fish
Admired the purple flowering sea weeds
Green fluffy grasses waved
As the gentle current caressed me
Yes; had a glorious swim
At lovely Christies Beach...
Thank you Lord for a great day

Letters from home

So many letters from home
Light blue Air Mail envelopes
From Hungary they've come
Filled with love and hope
Words written on thin paper
Written with loving hearts; hands
They are gone now; lost in time
So many memories; far off lands
Love letters from a frozen clime
Mum kept them all; it's true
It's all she had of her loved ones
All these precious words on blue
No voices heard on telephones
Too expensive a communication; true
Just words written on blue paper
Sent with love; "From me to you"

Travellers abroad

They returned to their old homeland

Only three times in their lives

Visited their families

Told of this wide brown land

Joyfully they travelled

Over many thousands of miles

To hug and kiss their parents

To hold them in their hands

The photos tell the stories

Of the happiness that flowed

As they revisited their childhood

Experienced love that glowed

Making up for lost the years

Making up for those lonely times

Missing their dear families

Left behind in the old homeland

In 1978, 1983, and 1988

They flew over the oceans

Flew over desert sands

Travelling so much faster

Than when they left those lands

Even more joyful was their return

To this beautiful Australia

Downunder; surrounded by white sands

Arrival

From Genoa to Australia
Way back in 1956
Mum and dad left behind
Their families; their mates
My brother was a toddler
I was smuggled in
I always tell this story
With a silly grin
Inside my mother's belly
From Hungary; I was brought 
Aboard the Aurelia
Over oceans; danger fraught 
To this wild red land
They emigrated; so many years ago
This wide brown land was fated
To be in their lives; to show
No matter what land birthed you
No matter from whence you came
Australia became your country
Australia claims you for its own...

Dad's memories of Tasmania

After showing dad the souvenirs
Of Tasmania; Queenstown circa 1962
I recounted some of my thoughts
And memories from that family trip
Princess of Tasmania cruise
Queenstown mountain driving
I didn't like all the bends
I asked which car it was and
Was it true we were having a race?
With some young people
Was there an accident up there?
This is what he replied...
We took the red and white Holden
On our trip to the Apple Isle
All was good my darling girl
on that trip to the Fair Isle
But I remember it was an earlier time
I'b bought the old Ford Customline
For 500 pounds; second hand
We were driving along the Great Ocean Road
When some young people wanted to race
I got her up to 100 miles per hour
Before I stopped racing; slowed down
Your mum, brother and you were in the car...
Turned around and headed back to Geelong...
Just as well I didn't continue on
For as I turned into our driveway
The kingpin in the front wheel gave out...
You wouldn't be writing here right now
If i hadn't turned back then

I thank God we are all here
Safe and sound...
You never know what could have happened
If my darling dad
Had not turned around...

Answer a prayer

Oops I'min trouble deep
Almost threw out
My brother's law book
How was I supposed to know?
He was keeping these old notes
In good condition; my contrition
Is because I didn't think to ask...
So I was most definitely taken to task
Sorry brother I replied; can't be denied
I made a mistake; for heaven's sake
How many of us have placed a note?
For safe keeping; never thinking 
We'd ever forget the book we used
Ah I was confused; years ago
$100 note was put away by Tim
For safe keeping; alas I know
It is long gone; but as I sit and think
Some poor soul; upon the brink
Maybe prayed for help from up above
God answered their prayers that day
When opening up some op-shop book
Imagine their face; imagine their look
Prayers are answered in amazing ways
Yes; in this time; in this day and age...

Watch in a ring

Found mum's old watch today
A watch in a ring; unusual I say
Never seen another like it
Just a little worthless trinket
Maybe; but mum used to love it
Today I am wearing it...
She wore it for many years
Remembering brings on the tears
Ah mum I miss you so very much
Here I am with your treasures
Nothing very valuable as such
But by what yardstick are such things measured?
You lived simply; loved with all your heart
Took care of your precious family
Made taking care of all of us
Your amazing, beautiful art...

Goodbye Mary Anne

Attended a funeral today
At The Garden Of Memory
In the Barmera cemetery
Said farewell to another's mum
She's gone too soon they said
Now she will surely rest her head
Found a couple of memorials
Of people I had known
Michael "Mick" Bacskai aged 52
Looked around at the listed names
But no matches ever came
Was looking for Elizabeth Bacskai
And for little Mary Anne too
But couldn't find their plot
Wanted to say hello I guess
Wanted to let them know
They are still here in my heart
Will never be forgotten by me
Never forgotten by their family
They are asleep; waiting for our Lord
Until He returns; they'll never say a word
But those who remain will be comforted
For these promises ring true
Jesus promised to return
He will come for them; for me; for you

Mum's busy hands

Going through the wardrobe

Have to clear it out

So many clothes, mum

Never knew you had so much

I knew you were a hoarder

That's where i get it from

Only now i know my darling 

Clothes do not make the man

Nor do they make the woman

So many hand made dresses

You were so talented mum

All the knitting that you have done

Your hands were always busy

No doubting that my lovely one

Now i have to empty all these cupboards

I have to give them all away

What use are all these possessions

When you have gone away...

I hope they are loved again

Appreciated it's true

For there was so much love

Sewn into all these clothes by you...

Alone again naturally

I don't like being alone
As much as I used to
I don't like not hearing
Your laughter; your voice
I don't like this quietness
Anymore; it's true
I miss you...
I agreed to stay busy
I agreed to get it all done
But darling I miss you
This is just not fun
This distance is killing me
This parting; being alone
Is becoming tiresome
Please let me explain...
We want to be together
For always; for ever my love
But all that needs doing
Must be accepted; must come
So I am alone; in heart and soul
Though physically there is someone
Around me; beside me; confide in me
But you are not beside me
You are not here
So here inside; I feel alone

Waves breaking

Like waves breaking 
Emotions crashing
Over me
Tired of all the pain
Need to be free
Oh mum...I miss you

16 January 2017

Tirade

'Tis only those who are afraid

Let loose their vile tirade

They feel the need to verbalise

While internally they're terrorised

They feel the need to act so brave

Feel the need to rant and rave

There is no peace within them

No joy to take hold of; within them

It is trouble they seek to deliver

It comes; flying out from deep within...

Going through the motions

Teenagers...
Going through the motions
Thinking they're in love...
Holding each other closer
Desperately seeking; to prove
Feeling someone's lips
Feeling someone's hands
Thinking to find paradise
In every one night stand

Uncomplicated

Honest 
Straightforward
To the point
That's you 
Refreshing qualities
It's true
Honey, I thank you 
For just being you 

Sit beside me

Please sit beside me honey
No need to say a word
Just your presence darling 
Is all I need in this world

Though my thoughts fly far, wide
My mind wanders it is true
Just knowing you are close 
Is all I need from you

For mum 
20 December 2016

Unvalentine

I don't want a valentine 
I don't need someone 
Just for one day...
I need someone who wants to stay
For a lifetime; for infinity; it's true 
And my love; I want it to be you 

Read my mind

I am amazed at this connection
You read my very thoughts
As soon as I think them; you know
You voice the feelings that I feel
Like when I was exhausted...
Just the other day
Walking past that ant hill
My tired brain at play...
"What if I fell upon that ant hill
Couldn't move to save myself
Would they sting and bite until
I was nothing more than bones"
Straight away you said it out loud
About falling upon the ant hill...
I laughed to hear the very words
That had just flown through my mind
Ah Lord it is simply amazing 
To find a connection such as this
Never in my whole life have I
Felt as close; as connected as this
So many times it has happened
This chemistry between two souls
The very thing I've always wanted
Is happening right now; it's true
This amazing, wonderful feeling
Where our two minds have met
This wonderful feeling of knowing you...
Is this what I've been dreaming of?
I guess it must be so...
I said it months ago to you
"How can you miss something 
That you have never had?"
How can you ever think to understand
Something so amazing and so strong 
How could it possible be wrong?
We talk about a million things
We have discussed things...
I have never thought of asking about
All I can say is; please keep on loving me
Please my darling; always stay
I value every moment that we have shared
I long for many more blessed times with you 
If only we would be spared...

Formatted

Dropped my USB stick
Felt it falling; was so quick
Did some damage; this I know

God help me re-save those files; somehow
Everything has gone from March to October
Now I must find out; IF they can be recovered
Need I re-save every single word I've lost?
Need I re-type all those words; ah the time it cost!
It's all too much for me right now
Can't face the worry this brings; right now
It is all beyond my patience
All beyond my grasp...

I'll just have to be thankful for my training 
I realise it pours; when it's raining... 
The words I recall from years ago you see
Tell me to do this when saving words; gee
"Back up; back up; back up!''
The three greatest rules; these we were taught 
In case you lose it all; you won't be caught!... 
So; luckily for me; I have saved them on my website
Saved them by printing them out; hard copy!
Saved onto my external hard drive...
And saved them onto my USB; yes siree!
At least it will be easier than starting from scratch...

Normal

What is normal?
Good question!
Lately I've been living 
Out of suitcases
Out of my car
I guess it makes sense
Have had to travel so far
Back and forth between
The country and city
Enjoyed all the driving
But now; I'm done
I've had enough
It would be soooo nice
To be able to relax
Not have to pack; unpack
Feel the same bed
Beneath my tired body
The same place to rest
That would not feel shoddy
It would be nice to be normal
Yes; normal; like other people...

Zac's book of everything

Zac wanted something special
Zac wanted something new
Zac wanted something different
Zac wanted something he could do
"Nana do you have any empty books?
Something nobody has written in?
Something nobody else has used?
Something I can have just for me?"
"Yes indeed I have my love
I have an empty book for you
You may have it my darling boy
And fill it with everything special to you!"

Scorcher

Scorcher, scorcher
Hot bloody torture
Can't breathe
Can't leave
Everything is burning 
Though earth's turning
It doesn't seem to end
Just a little respite
Just a little break
These days of madness
Makes everybody freak
Night brings a tiny breeze
Open up hot houses, windows ajar
Let the coolness in, everyone say aaah...

Until the morning when it starts again

My special treasure

This picture book has ever been
My special treasure; my pearl
Ever since my parents gifted it to me
Yes; ever since I was a little girl...
The artwork I found enchanting 
Just like the stories I found inside
It has been my favourite storybook
It has always been my joy; my pride
I coloured in the precious pictures
Added some sparkle; deeper hues
Because I wanted to make it better
Simply because I really wanted to...
I loved to dream about my future
Loved to imagine that princess was me
Being kissed upon my own pink lips
Being swept off my own two feet; you see
Every little girl dreams of her future
Every little girl seeks to grow into beauty
Getting married; having her own children
Being loved and doing her family duty

Today I read a story to my grand daughter
She is only three yeas of age
Today we shared a very special bond
As we sat together; turned the page

I saw in her eyes the glorious wonder
I saw in her a special love; it's true
A love for beauty, joy hope for the future
Just like I had; probably just like you do too...

The Sleeping Beauty and other stories 
by C Perrault
Illustrated by BenVenuti
Retold by Shirley Goulden
1958
Reprinted in 1963

Hear His voice

Ah but hear His voice
He calls out your name
It is for this very purpose
That our dear Lord came
He calls to you dear one 
He tells us to have a hope
For He has paid our price
'Tis only through Him we cope...

Blessings of peace

Peace and love to all mankind
What better way to live?
Than to keep on moving forward
Allowing everyone to believe
In almighty God and the universe
In freedom, peace and joy
For every man and woman
For every girl and boy...

Soul in Hibernation

Some days I feel like I could sleep
Never wake up to face this deep
Pain that seems to come and seep
Into my very bones: ah Lord keep
Me safe from harm; hear me weep
These tears are coming; they keep
Sneaking up on me; as you can see
I am not doing as well as I should be

If I were a bear in winter time
How wonderful it would be to find
A soft warm place to snuggle in
There I'd sleep until It was time
To wake and feel refreshed; ah time
How do we ever know how much is left?
We know not what time we've got...

So many of our loved ones have gone
Like bears; hibernating until the time is right
As we return to the dust from which we came
No, not one of us will remain the same
For all must face this earthly crust until
Our spirits refresh themselves in heaven above
With Jesus: on that appointed day He is to come
Just as bears awaken to the "spring" of His return
So shall our spirits unite with the incorruptible
New bodies as promised by our Father...

Like David, Elijah, Solomon, Esther too
Ruth, Hannah, Nehemiah, Job, Jeremiah 
Martha, John the Baptist and even Jesus too
We have joined their ranks;in feeling depressed
We all partake in these moments of suffering...
This will pass and God will use these weak times
To refine our souls; in the meanwhile we must pray
For friends to faithfully uphold us throughout sadness
That on that day the storm passes...
We will lift up our eyes and behold the beautiful rainbow...

4 February 2016

The other side of the bridge

Took a drive along the river's edge
Needed space and time to think
Felt like crying; don't know why
Actually I do; I not tell a lie
My life is being turned upside down
Should be smiling but I wear a frown
Why can't life be simple is my beef
Why can't things flow; cause no grief
I am doing the very best I can 
But it never seems enough man
Can't seem to please the masses
Feels like I'm swimming in molasses
God help me to climb out of this pit
I feel lost in darkness; that is it
It's like I see the light; burning brightly
Only to have my candle snuffed; nightly
I seem to put my foot into my mouth
Stuff up; drift north instead of south
But this I realise; It's all in my own hands
I have a choice; I must take my chance
Keep moving ahead; in this life's dance
In the midst of this deep river I see
My boat; far from shore: I see me
Letting go of the oars; drifting free
Allowing this strong current to take me

Dinner at the Berri Club 2017

Having a lovely dinner at the Berri Club
I'm sitting in the seat mum used to sit
I'm reminiscing about golden times
About all those days with family
Whether celebrating birthdays
Or simply gathering together for a meal
Guess it will never quite be the same
Never will I hear mum's voice again
Never will I see her smiles
As her children and grandchildren
Gathered around her having fun
Dancing to the music; running amok
Actually they were good kids
Just having a little fun; a little run
In the open space; on the dance floor
Simply being lively young kids...

Down by the River Murray

Sat upon the river bank
Watching the sun go down
God painted the evening sky
With amazing colours; I cannot lie
I was transfixed for quite a while
My heart uplifted; my lips smiled
How could I capture this scene?
How could I ever do it justice?
With mere words; ah glorious sight 
How could I ever tell another soul
Just how beautiful; just how pure
The oranges, reds and golds appeared
Pink hues that moved across the water
Spread out to touch all borders
Light and shadow changed anon
As the sun set magnificently
As the huge red orb went down
Until finally that painting was done...

31 January 2017

Please stop adding me

Please grant me some peace
As I grieve for my dear mum
Please stop adding me!
To groups YOU think I might like
I have enough to deal with
I am lost in my own grief
I don't have time to read
Each and every message; though brief
It's like time is standing still; yet
It's like everyone's a time thief
It's enough for me to know
That you are thinking of me
But please don't be remiss
Please accept that I am strained
Right now I am being torn in two
Thoughts and prayers most welcome
Soon; I will have time to get back to you

29th January 2017

Blessed Sabbath

Blessed Sabbath
Feeling renewed
Enjoying sunshine
Troubles eschewed
Glorious Father
In heaven above
Sending His angels
Sending His love...

28th January 2017

My girly girl

Elfy is my little angel
She is so cute you see
Elfy loves to be a girl
Pink is her favourite 
As colours go you'll see
For pink is for girly girls
And a truly girly girl is she...

Letter from a daughter of Zion

Received a letter from a lovely lady 
Daughter of Zion; the King's daughter
Holy Spirit of God; these things she told
The creator of all the universe 
Has taken his time to speak a word 
To you sister...He says
You are a beautiful lady of the Lord
He says to tell you 
You are walking in the beauty of Christ
You have the word of understanding 
Of the word of God in your heart
He had the fullness of Christ in you 
In the hope of glory great...
To be praised in the city of our God
In a mountain of its holder; beautiful situation
The joy of the whole earth in Mount Zion
Is on the South and North 
Of the city of the great King
Greater is He in you than He is in the world
I can do all things in Christ Jesus who strengthens me

The fullness of Christ is blessed in you
And walking in the super blessings 
Christ is with you the daughter of heavenly Zion...

Jackie Glenn Summers 4th December 2016

Incident at Bashams Beach

Two blue parachutes in the distance
High up in the cloudy sky
Drifting erratically downwards
I must confess I thought it strange
Asked my best mate about their fate
Where could they possibly land?
We bought our lunch and decided
To go to Bashams Beach to feast
Parked upon the hill to view the ocean
We're amazed at what met our eyes
Two CFS trucks were down there
Two ambulances also gathered close
Two SES rescue vehicles in attendance
An unmarked police car parked nearby
Two grey haired gentlemen talking
Coroners called in to offfer a verdict?
Serious looks upon all their faces
Like a gathering of mourners at a wake
They milled about and then departed
The man in the wetsuit walked about
A woman drove her car up the hill
Stopped, waited for the black vehicle
Spoke a few words before they all left
We drove on down and parked our vehicle
Took a look at the glorious waves
In the bright summer sunshine
Used the huge binoculars perched there
Watched the surfers out in the ocean
Saw a man walking across the bay
Enjoyed the peace for a few more moments
Before we turned to walk away
A you man came riding quickly forward
Asked if anyone was still nearby
Said Channel Nine News had called him
Asked him to shoot some footage
Of the events unfolding down at Bashams Beach
We said "sorry you just missed them
They just left 20 minutes ago"
Couldn't find it on the news
Couldn't find it on websites...
Don't know what happened
But there was an incident at Bashams Beach