Mum's happy smiles

My mum doesn't smile much anymore
Who could blame her anyway: poor dear
Leukemia has stolen away her smiles 
She is exhausted by every little thing
Cannot sleep at night: this is her life
But I recall a time long ago
When I saw evidence of happiness
Those photos from Hungary
She was smiling and happy then
Visiting her precious family so far away
Yes I have evidence of better days
Younger days when time was lighter
When smiles came easier to us all
She has always been a fighter: still is
But this battle will steal her away
I have to watch her as she declines
Over time I will become sadder: yes I will
Oh dear Lord please help me bear it
Though I wish there were another way
I understand her stubbornness 
I know her through and through
She was always the tough one
Had to be that way: dad was the softie
So mum had to be the tough one
No choice: it was just so!
Last time I visited: I felt physically ill
Anxious: as I drove that long distance
Wondering if there would be visible signs?
Wondering if I would see a difference?
A weakness in her stance: at a glance
Would she be less than she has been?
I had to step back and think on it
I had to realise that I cannot change her life
It is all in my dear Lord's hands
I just have to take it as it comes
Trusting in God's divine plans
All I have are my prayers for my mum
After all: it is "God's will be done!"