Letter from mum

I found a little letter
Just a tiny note
From my dearest mother
Yes it was from my mum
I was bleeding heavily
It just would not stop
Had me worried to say the least
A crazy end to my 
Child bearing days: a beast!
She said "My darling 
Here is $150 dollars
Please see the specialist
You can come to Waikerie
See the same doctor I did
We need to find out what is wrong"

There was no date upon it
But looking back through my diary
I found the time it mentioned
It was around December in 2007

It went on for several months
After a lull for 6 long weeks
I thought it was all over but
Then it returned: it really peaked
I had to change everything
Almost every waking hour for days
Huge clots were coming out
it was like I was miscarrying
Like losing a precious child
I went to my doctor and we tried
Primulot tablets: 3 per day
For 5 days at a time
It stopped for 3 days and then
Started all over again
Saw another doctor then
We tried 2 per day for 15 days
But after about a week
The headaches were so awful
I just could not cope!
Headaches and dizziness had me
I was going crazy yes I was!
But I finally got to see the specialist!

A curette was what the doctor ordered
To remove the offending cells
Then an implant directly to the spot
To keep the hormones heading in
But the headaches drove me crazy
I took it for as long as I possibly could
But I had to have that Mirena removed!
For me it was just no good!

My hair fell out in hand fulls
My skin was pale and wan
I was constantly breathless
All my energy was gone

I cried out unto the Lord in heaven
Apologized profusely for my weakness
Said I was so sorry I was undone
Said I was so sorry I was useless
Was there nothing to be done?

I found a book in the op-shop
"The King's daughter" it was called
About another poor weak woman
Who learned to love the Lord
Even in her weakness; she was favoured!
Yes He gave her wonderful visions
She wrote poems and beautiful songs
When she was the very weakest
That's when God gave her words

I thank the Lord almighty
For He answered my prayers
Has given me direction: led me
Showed me that it is at our weakest
That He loves to give us showers
Yes: showers of blessings 
Showers of His blessed Hope
For it was when I was weakest 
That He gave to me: yes to little me
The most wonderful of blessings
The most wonderful of gifts
The gift for words to touch another's heart
The gift of His mighty strength and love!
These He showers upon me
From His heavens up above!