Catharsis of my life

My writing is a catharsis: I get to relive so many
Of those happenings from my earlier years
I guess it's good to go back to dissect all those torments
That used to give me hell when I was still growing up!
This way I get to have a look at a lot of my life and really see
That I was not such a bad person like I imagined I used to be!
I get to look at all those things that used to get me down!
How amazing to look back at my life to find that I was
A lot better at stuff than I thought I was as a child
I get to let go of my childish imaginings
I get to remember so many things
I now see how wrong I was to blame myself
For my own unhappiness for all those teen problems
I thought I had to go through!
I wasn't as ugly as I then used to think I was
It was just my silly mind making me feel bad
I used to think I was fat & ugly growing up
In reality: as I look back now: I was okay
It just goes to show how things affect us
My thoughts were negative because 
After I was interfered with: I felt dirty
I felt less than clean & pure: I felt so ugly within myself
I felt like it was my fault that those things happened to me
That one episode of my life affected everything else that happened!