Primary school photos

Looking back in time at my early school photos
I see a different me that existed then
Free and full of fun; no problems then.
Later; just a few mire years along the track
A different face appears and in her eyes I see
A totally different me; introverted and unsure
Hiding inside that body that was and is me
But different because something had changed
I was no longer innocent and free.
Now; its like I see that darker cloud
That hovers there inside my psyche
A hurt and lonely little me; hiding there
No-one else but me could know
What torment lies beneath that face
Still smooth and young except for
That frown that I see between my brows
For I know what happened
I don't know exactly when
But I know how everything changed
For what seemed the worse
As I was stranded there in that dark and lonely past
No-one to cling to; no anchor to hold me fast
No! How does a five year old tell her mum?
How does anyone explain?
How to form those words that lay the blame?
How could I even know how wrong it was?
How does a child explain?
When feeling something wrong is taking place
Yet how does a little child even try to understand?
How to grasp the situation and then change?
There I was; that little child; feeling guilty of a sin
Yet not even knowing it as anything
No words to try to even explain
My mind beyond that evil that was done
My body touched; explored; though not yet ripe!